"Is God prompting you?"
Wanting to grow deeper in her walk with God, Allison took the step to be confirmed at KKMC’s Baptism and Confirmation service held on 2 Aug 2020. She shares her reflections with us here.
Born and raised in a Christian family, my parents would read the Bible and pray with me every night. I would listen to Christian CDs and watch Christian children shows and my parents would incorporate Christian values in their teachings. I grew up in a very wholesome, nurturing Christian environment – understanding that we need God in our lives, and we are nothing without Him. However, as I grew older, I realised that I was taking all these lessons at face value and not putting effort into applying them into my life to grow closer to God. It worsened as I started prioritising my studies above God.
As a very goal-driven person, l was determined to achieve all the goals I set for myself. Thus, I invested a lot of time into studying, to excel academically, and training, to perform well in my CCA Track & Field. I worked hard, doing all I could to achieve everything I set out to achieve. However, this resulted in me not spending time with God at all. I did not do my daily devotion; I always fell asleep before l could finish saying my nightly prayer and I would be so drained from all the work that I could not focus during LifeGroup sessions on Sunday.
Soon, going to church felt like just a routine. I could feel myself drifting away from God, only turning to Him when I needed His help. I had my priorities all wrong and did not take my walk with God seriously. My parents, still being the nurturing Christian parents they are, constantly reminded me of the importance of building a close relationship with God and finding an area of service in church. I acknowledged that I wanted and needed to grow closer to God, but was still very invested in working hard to achieve my goals. Thus, I would simply tell myself to do something about my walk with God, but not put in the effort to do so.
My parents on the other hand, did not give up on me. They kept encouraging me to attend membership class as a step towards growing closer to God. I knew that I would have to attend it one day, as I wanted to be confirmed and take that step to build my relationship with God. However, l felt that I was not ready and would always conveniently tell my parents "yes l will go, but not now". Following which, I succumbed to procrastination.
But deep inside, there was my desire to strengthen my relationship with Him. I remembered that during the 2019 Christmas service, Pastor Kenneth invited all who wanted to commit their lives in the new year to God to stand.
I was never the kind to raise my hand or stand up when such questions were asked, but this time, I stood up. I knew that I could not procrastinate any longer and if I truly wanted to grow closer to God, I had to start somewhere.
Thus, l took the first step to tell God I wanted to commit my life to Him in 2020. At this point, I still did not know how I could grow closer to Him.
However, things changed during service on 29 December 2019. While Pastor Kenneth was making the pulpit announcements, he shared about membership class and encouraged those interested to attend it saying, "For those who stood up during Christmas service, maybe attending membership class is your way of committing your lives to God this new year". There was a feeling in my heart that urged me to attend this round of membership class. However, I was still very concerned about my studies and was hesitant to sign up.
But no matter how hard I thought of reasons to delay attending membership class, the urge in my heart remained constant. So I prayed and asked God to give me a sign of confirmation if it really was His will that I start attending membership class.
The next moment, out of nowhere, my mum asked me "Is God prompting you?". I was so surprised at her comment that I could only smile as I knew God had answered my prayer. I decided to trust in God and sign up for membership class as I just felt a sense of peace in my heart.
I'm thankful for all that has happened that helped me take this step towards growing closer to God. I know simply having attended class won't make things better in my walk with God. Although I am still very occupied with my studies, I am putting in more effort to set aside time for God daily. I'm blessed to be His child and I hope to continually build a stronger relationship with Him.